Some Food Grains

But which food grains?? Aye! There's the rub! (Flour?)

kana_machi_vo_vo, a Yahoo!Chat user managed to weed through the fogginess of his (or her?) brain and venture into the usual HIV/AIDS chat room in Yahoo! Messenger. First thing it said was, "Hi everybody hiv/aids can be cured. it is true" which you know is going to pique my interest. It promised it was telling the truth and then said, "it will cost you US dollar 5000 when the patient is cured." Very well, I know where to take it from there.

So I did. (But not before I had a ton of disconnection issues. It eventually all worked out....)

In between all those disconnections, KanaMacho here kept promising that it was telling the truth! It even swore on the Almighty. Though, Almighty what, it never said. Judging by the $5,000US price tag, I'd say the almighty dollar.

Why is KanaTwit trolling for patients in the chat room? Well, as it said, all patients in its country are "brainwashed". (An entire country that brainwashes its citizens??)

What the hell is this cure that costs $5,000US? "Food Grains". Which ones, KanaIdiota never would say. Some sort of major secret, I suppose. But what it did say about these Food Grains was that they have "no side effect" and the "Food Grains" that cure HIV were put together out of passages of the holy books. Which holy books, you ask? Nearly all of the major ones. The Bible, Quran, and Vedh. (I'm not familiar with any holy book named "Vedh". And a quick Google search also was unfamiliar with any holy book named "Vedh". Of course, I'm not terribly surprised.)

KanaMacho went so far as to tell someone to come to Bangladesh and "stay in your preffered secured place. i shall treat you without any money till you get cured. i swear". Which, of course, begs the question how long does this bullshit cure take? Kana says, "within 120 days you will be cured." FOUR MONTHS!? You want me to pay for a friggin' hotel room for up to FOUR MONTHS while you do nothing but give me "food grains"???

How many people has Kana cured? It's a 100% success rate, by the way. Kana's cured a whopping five people. FIVE!?! That's it! Kana isn't trying very hard....

In fact, that's where this Kana person kinda loses any credibility at all. Kana said that even though he can't get any patients in his own country (all brainwashed, remember?) he was able to get 5 people from another country to take this cure. All five people were unwilling to "stand" with Kana as he "declared" this cure because HIV is highly stigmatized in his country. I replied, "But they have been cured; they don't have HIV any more so what's the problem?" You'd think that someone who'd been among the first five EVER cured of HIV infection would want to make sure that as many people knew about it as possible. But maybe that's just me. But, perhaps, these people aren't actually cured of anything and don't want to deceive people. In thinking the best of people, I'd hafta go with that option.

How did Kanafuck get his five patients? Though lying and deciet. Really. He admits it. He said he contacted some hospitals because he was writing on the lives of those who are HIV positive in Bangladesh. Thing is, he wasn't writing anything at all. He LIED and now he expects people to believe him when he says some "food grains" can cure HIV infection with no side effects. (What about those who might be alergic to, say, wheat gluten? Of course, assuming that wheat is one of the food grains this asshole thinks can cure HIV infection.)

I also asked about testing and the usual verification of results. But, Kana was too scared to submit this "medicine" for testing because, according to him, someone would steal the medicine and claim they invented it themselves. SHENNANEGANS!

I summed up this asshole's cure by stating, "So, you lied to get in contact with people with HIV or AIDS. You didn't test this medicine before giving it to people. And you can't provide any proof that you have a cure for anything. Why do you expect me to believe you?"

About the only thing Kana said that was probably actually true was, "I am a non-medical person". Well, that much is obvious.

Attending A Church Service in Lagos, Nigeria

It's the cure for lazy people!

Yes, that's right. You don't have to do anything other than show up at a church service in Lagos, Nigeria. But not just any ol' church service; it's gotta be at the "Christian Praying Assembly Church" in Lagos.

In the usual Yahoo!Chat room, a user, Chubbychubby74, ran in, shouted at the top of his keyboard's lungs, "HIV/AIDS IS 100% CURABLE FREE OF CHARGE" and "ITS [sic] CURE(100%) NOT TREATMENT". Several times he shouted this each time with an admonition to PM him.

Being the antithesis of gullible that I am, I PMed him. (Wow, it's big-word-day here at the blog, aint it?)

I asked him to tell me about his "cure". And he replied, "I wonder why people take the power of god for granted" (this, too, was in all caps, but for the sake of legibility here, I'm not going to all-caps it.) Since this wasn't a reply to my statement, I pressed on again with asking him to tell me about this "cure". Again, he ignored me and said that it's 100% free of charge; which he had already said in the chat room.

I'm beginning to wonder why so many people seem to have such difficulty with reading comprehension these days....

I pestered him to tell me the name of the church and it took at least 5 minutes to get out of him the damn name of the church, "Christian Praying Assembly Church". You'd think that a church that can cure HIV infection simply by showing up would be ecstatic to have its name plastered all over the internet. But this one apparently operates in relative secrecy. (Don't tell anybody....)

Once again, I asked him to tell me about the "cure". His response this time was "Are u [sic] in Nigeria?" Regardless, I went back and forth with Chubby-Chubby-Two-by-- and eventually got out of him that this cure is by his "General Overseer", he wasn't joking, he saw his brother cured 100%, that it was 100% free and asked me if I can come to Nigeria.

When I asked him who verified that his brother was cured, he demonstrated his lack of reading comprehension skills again and replied, "Have u [sic] heard of His Holiness The Most Hon. Dr. Rev. King". (That's quite a few abbreviations before his name there, ain't it?) He went on to again tell me that it's 100% free and that he's not "demanding" money.

Anyway, I pressed on with the verification of his brother being cured. He said that "four hospitals" did "the complete HIV tests". Being that there is nothing I'm aware of that are called "The Complete HIV Tests", I asked him about them. He said he didn't know what they were and that I should just believe him.

When it was clear that I doubted him, he began what was one of the most despicable and exploitative shenanigans to try to convince me. He said that a friend of his (you know, Angie from the UK) doubted him and "she is dead now". He further said:

• "IF AM LYING LET GOD BLESS YOU, BUT IF AM SAYING THE TRUTH, FROM NOW TILL THE END OF 2009, YOU SHALL DIE"
• "WHAT I PRONOUNCED UPON YOU WILL PROVE TO YOU OK"
• "WE WILL KNOW WHO WILL FUCK INSIDE THE GRAVE"
• "I HAVE SPOKEN TO U INTRHE NAME OF GOD"
• "GET BEHIND ME SATAN"

So, I went ahead and asked Chubby Chubby 2x4 here to do something a little more kind: Make it rain outside my house if he was speaking for God. "I'll even accept a light drizzle".

He further proceeded to tell me that I was "dirty" and that he was giving me HIV instead of making it rain; all in the name of his all-loving God.

And then he left.

He's been back since then. And my offer of believing him if he can make it rain on demand still stands... I think we're in for a rather dry summer....

(I suspect that another user, njidekaking, is the same person as chubbychubbytwobyfour here; they both promote the "Attend a church service in Nigeria and be cured" bullshit with the same all capital letters and the same "May god punish me blah blah blah". My apologies if they are not the same person. However, looking through the internet real quick it's clear that they are at least speaking of the same church and same "hon. dr. rev. ms. prof. whatev. King")

Herbs Smeared on Your Body by the President of The Gambia on Thursday

This comes to us from the President of The Gambia. It's a tiny, insignificant country on the Atlantic coast of Africa.

See? There it is. So cute and tiny and insignificant and surrounded on three sides by Senegal. So I suppose it's only reasonable that President Jammeh, President of The Gambia, should take time away from his busy, busy schedule to study, develop, test, and administer a cure for HIV and AIDS. But, you should know, it's only available on Thursdays (on Friday or Saturday, he cures asthma). And only to 10 people. Really. He says,

The mandate I have is that HIV/Aids cases can be treated on Thursdays. That is the good news and the bad news is that I cannot treat more than ten patients every Thursday. There is nothing I can do about it and if I go beyond that I will have to pay the price. (http://www.statehouse.gm/pres-rvth-board_170107.htm)

I don't really know what to say about this. I mean, come on! An herbal cure for AIDS that is only available to 10 people and only on Thursday? And the same thing that cures 100 people of asthma?

Anyway, let's dig a little deeper... He has a whole string of seemingly arbitrary "requirements" for people receiving this "treatment". One of which is to not chew chewing gum. And to not take any "western" medicines other than the ones he's using on you. Yes, that's right, this "cure" involves the use of "western" medicines. (I assume those are anti-HIV medications such as Sustiva, Zerit, Epivir, Atripla, etc.)

He even goes so far as to publish a page with the supposed Viral Loads of those people he's treated. But, if you look at those numbers, they're incredibly bad! Viral loads in the 19-million and upwards of 63-MILLION copies!! And, in others, the viral loads are merely undetectable. That is probably about the farthest from a cure I've seen!!

And, he also lists the CD4 counts of those same patients. And, they're not much better! CD4 counts as low as 23 is NOT A CURE!!!

I sure hope that this asshole's "patients" get better treatment from someone who actually knows what the hell they're doing. This ass isn't doing anything to help his "patients".

By the way, you can also Search the Archives on his site for even more astounding bullshit.

????????

(Yes, I really do mean a bunch of question marks.)

jackie_avery08 claims to have been cured of HIV infection by a doctor with the highly credible email address of drwilliamsyemi@yahoo.co.uk in Nigeria.

What is the cure? Nobody knows. And neither Jackie nor "Dr." William Syemi are talking about it. Other than to say there's a cure. (Why do Nigerian "doctors" think they can just say something and expect people to believe it? Don't they know that it's up to the person making the claim to prove it? I suppose not...) Why aren't they talking about it? Because the Nigerian Government will take the cure from them. So they have to announce the cure as anonymous internet chat room users on Yahoo.

I asked Jackie to prove that there was a cure. He (she?) wanted to know how to do that so I gave the usual lines of "peer-reviewed medical journal," "independantly verified," etc., etc., etc... The response: "I will never do that because the doctor wants us to keep everything in coded [sic]"

And the conversation just sort of degenerated from there. It was ugly. "May the blood of those you infect be on your hands," "Then you wil die!" stuff like that.

Never fear, though. Jackie will be back either under that screen name or some other hawking the usual bullshit line. "I have a cure! Believe me! I do!"

Goat Serum

(Since the below post was written and posted I've come to realize that both Precious and Rocky Thomas do in fact exist and aren't figments of someone's imagination. I considered removing potentially snide and rude comments I made about both of them but didn't want to appear to "rewriting history" so the thinly veiled jabs stay in the post. I still, however, do not believe that this "Goat Serum Cure" is in any way whatsoever helpful--may in fact be harmful--to someone living with HIV or AIDS. October 13, 2009)

Also known as BB:7075. Or maybe even peHRG 214. More on those later.

The cure for AIDS for this month/week/whatever was "discovered" (i.e., made up out of the blue) by asshole and general practitioner Dr. Gary R. Davis of Tulsa, Oklahoma. (But maybe it wasn't. More on that later.)

Back in December 1992, Dr. Davis apparently shouted a command to the heavens, "If you're God, then act like God!" That night, he had a dream. (Cue mysterious music.) In this dream, he was naked in a barn with a goat. (Cut it with the music!) What kind of goat is never mentioned. That's unfortunate. What's more unfortunate is why was he dreaming about being naked with a goat in a barn. That's just kinda creepy.

Regardless, he stuck a dream-needle into the dream-goat in the dream-barn and drew some of the dream-goat's dream-blood. When he awoke, he realized that he knew all sorts of stuff about HIV he didn't before. Like, for example, what he told his family, "Did you know that a goat cannot contract HIV?"

(No fucking shit, Sherlock! It's called HUMAN Immunodeficiency Virus for a reason.)

Then, much later, and as reported by one Forres McGraw (who claims to be a reporter for the Greenwich Village Gazette), precious 7-year-old Precious Thomas had AIDS, was being seen by doctors at the National Institutes of Health and had a Viral Load of 118,119 (which seems a bit too precise, by the way). But, after using Dr. Davis' bullshit Goat Serum (I guess retrieved by squeezing a part of the goat that might get you arrested and charged by the Humane Society), precious Precious' precious viral load went preciously to "ZERO [sic]". (Never mind that viral load tests aren't fucking accurate to anything less than 50 (or maybe 25, I'm not sure); that's why it's called "undetectable".)

Here's the story. In 1995, Dr. Davis "developed" his treatment, one year later, he applied to the FDA to perform a clinical trial with his Goat Juice. While apparently initially approved, that approval was revoked.

Meanwhile, back in Bethesda, MD, Rocky Thomas, Precious' precious unfortunately-named mother, was apparently comforting Precious who was "in the hospital". Whatever that means. Heck, if you step inside the doors of a hospital, you are "in the hospital". Regardless, Ms. Thomas "vowed" to do whatever it took to help her daughter. Admirable; but in this case stupid.

Mrs. Thomas apparently recalled a news story on Dr. Davis' "treatment" and flew off to Tulsa to meet with him. According to the story, Dr. Davis was "barred" by the FDA from administering his "treatment". So, he apparently cancelled all his remaining appointments for the day and spent "much of his afternoon" with the Thomases.

So, standing by her vow, Rocky broke the law and stole a vial of the Goat Serum and administered it to her daughter. Afterwhich, precious Precious was "cured" of her awful HIV infection.

~~~~~

This story has so many problems it's amazing. But let me touch on a few.

First, an undetectable viral load is NOT cured! Sheesh! I would think even a GP (General Practitioner) would know this!

Second, this Rocky Thomas twit could have done some horrible things to the daughter she claimed to love so much by using an unproven and utterly untested "serum" on her! If this Rocky Thomas exists, I would love to see her prosecuted for child endangerment!

Not only that, Rocky Thomas admittedly broke the law by stealing the serum! This possibly fictional woman is a danger!! (One wonders if this "Mrs. Thomas" is the one who stole the goat serum from a "holding facility" in North Carolina as referenced on an FDA Web page warning persons not to use the Goat Serum at all....)

And the author of the "article", Mr. McGraw, attempts to twist the denial of the clinical trial by the FDA into some sort of racially-based discrimination! He states, "Why is the brilliant work of an African American General Practitioner being suppressed?" What an asshole!! Not everything "bad" that happens to an African American is because of his or her skin color! Fuck you, Mr. McGraw!

And, I found absolutely no references to Mr. McGraw's articles nor to this Precious Thomas on the web site for the Greenwich Village Gazette. (To be fair, I'm not sure how far back the Greenwich Village Gazette keeps articles. And, Mr. McGraw could have been summarily canned, booted, fired, kicked to the curb or otherwise dismissed from his duties after writing his article.)

Finally, there is a lot of information on the internet about this Goat Serum. It's called BB:7075 by Dr. Davis. And, a quick search on "BB:7075 HIV" yields an interesting page at the Ghana AIDS Commission's web site. And that page is really where this bullshit Goat Juice really crashes and burns.

Most notably:

"The Commission further stated that no pre-clinical studies have been conducted on BB: 7075 with respect to HIV 1 Virus." (Remember precious Precious from earlier? If she was infected in the US, chances are that she has HIV 1 and the fucking Goat Juice has NEVER BEEN TESTED ON HER STRAIN OF THE VIRUS!!

And, I leave you with this lengthy-ish bombshell from near the end of the Ghana AIDS Commission's web site:

Contrary to the above [claims that Dr. Davis discovered or invented BB:7075], further search about BB:7075 on the internet and particularly on the [United States Food and Drug Administration] website, seems to suggest that Dr Davis is not the inventor of peHRG 214 [the name possibly given to the serum in a US clinical trial] as there is no documentation on the product except those placed on the internet by Dr. Davis himself. Drug development should generate substantial date. To date, Dr. Davis has not been able to provide any scientific date on his product."

What an asshole this Dr. Davis is!

(The references for the dream above came from Eightball Magazine and The Quiet Hour. Never let it be said that I don't publish my sources...)

ESP

Picture, if you will. A man named Ivan Gellner. Mr. Gellner has ESP but doesn't quite understand what it means. You'll see why later.

But for now, suffice it to say that Mr. Gellner claims to heal people "suffering from AIDS/HIV+". Apparently, he doesn't realize that people don't suffer from HIV+; they are HIV+. Doesn't bode well for the rest of what he says.

Mr. Gellner claims to do this healing through ESP. (Yes, yes, I know that ESP actually means Extra Sensory Perception but this guy apparently uses his perception to "heal" HIV and AIDS.) Is healing in the eye of the beholder??

He doesn't even need to be in the patient's presence to use his perception to heal. "You do not need to go to see me at all, because all is done by the distance/remote healing." "There is no physical contact with the patient's body. I practice so called 'distance healing'."

He goes on:

I exert influence on my patients for over 6 hours daily through meditation and an absolutely clear mind. The essential part is that I do this meditation for all of us. I say "for all of us", because I do meditation also for myself, of course, therefore I really meditate for all my patients concurrently.

This of course, begs the question, why doesn't his healing work for everybody in the world!? Why do people still have HIV and AIDS? Hell, why do people still get colds if this guy is spending 1/4 of his life "meditating" for "all of us"?? Oh, but I digress. Kinda.

He also says, "My personal approach is not to explain anything but trying to heal." So what he means is that he isn't doing a damn thing and wants you to pay him for it. But only after you see some healing effects. What are these healing effects? Well, according to our wonderful friend, Mr. Gellner:

• reduction and healing of many AIDS/HIV+ symptoms
• increase of CD4 cells
• stopped the decrease of CD4
• lowering of VL
• less [sic] side effects from medication
• restoration/rebuilding of the immune system
• whole body optimization
• more energy, and good mental health

What the hell is "whole body optimization"? Does Mr. Galbladder here run some sort of defragmentation program every day for at least six hours for all his rubes? I mean, Clients?

One would think that if the number of one's CD4 cells increased, they'd stop decreasing by definition, but he feels it necessary to make 'em separate. Still not a good sign, eh?

He also advocates continuing to take one's medications after one is diagnosed with "HIV+" regardless of his "healing". He continues and says that you should not expect a quick result from his healing and that it could take several months to see results from what he's doing. Problem is, he ain't doin' shit! He's just telling you to take your medications and then HE takes credit for causing good lab results!!!! STOP TAKING CREDIT FOR WHAT THE MEDICATIONS DO!!!!

Oh, wait. But maybe he's not healing at all. Despite all the claims to "heal" on his website, he says, "Please do not take this as a claim that I can heal it, because I still don’t know. (As of July 2006)"

So, he says he doesn't know and then says he can. And then says he'll charge you a non-refundable "application fee" of $39US to begin the perception of healing he says he doesn't know about. I guess that it's this $39 that begins the "free" four-month healing. Which, by the way, you're warned that the effects of that four-month non-existing healing are only temporary. After that, if you want to continue being thought about in a very, very vague way by someone you've never met, you'll have to pay Mr. Gellner $648US for the first year and then $468 each year after for "Maintenence Healing".

This asshole really does take the cake here. He says to continue taking your medications since his perceptual healing doesn't replace them and then takes credit (and your money) when the medications work.

How much do you want to bet his "meditation" takes place while he's shopping, driving, watching movies, taking vacations, flying to Italy, lying on the beach, etc.???

Mediatation (a.k.a. Meditation)

This cure comes from some fucking idiot nim-rod with the Yahoo! handle "vaguefeelingofdiscomfort". This insanely stupid person claims that by meditation alone (he first called it "mediatation") he got rid of HIV in his blood as evidenced by the negative HIV test result he most recently got.

The problem is that's also the only HIV test he's ever taken. You may very well ask yourself at this point "How can he know he got rid of HIV when he never even had a test to prove he had it in the first place?"... And an exceptionally valid question. When I asked this moron (I'll call him Vague) the same question he said that he had all the "symptoms" of HIV. Considering that HIV infection has no true symptoms that you can just look at and tell, I asked him what symptoms he had. He replied, "fatigue...slightly almost unnoticable enlarged lymphnodes". Sounds like mono to me. And I told him so. He said his doctor didn't say it was mono or the flu or mumps. In fact, his doctor told him he didn't have anything wrong. NOTHING WAS WRONG!!!

At this point, a room regular whom I shall call "Cetacebimjo" and who occasionally reads this blog piped in with "Eating a bad camel will give you those symptoms" which I thought was funny.

Like the fool I am, I pressed onward. "Why do you INSIST that your fatigue and 'barely noticable' enlarged lymph nodes were caused by HIV?" I asked.

To which he replied, "i had headache too". At this point, I just kinda assumed this fucker didn't quite understand English. Oh, and he had a "rash".

And still, I pressed onward. "Why do you insist that these 'symptoms' (which HIV infection does NOT cause) were caused by HIV infection???"

And, again, he replied with another "symptom", "i saw some vague white spots on my tongue".

Oh, so he had plaque. Big whoop. So I suggested that the "vague white spots" were simply plaque. And, displaying his vast medical knowledge with which he diagnosed himself with an ailment that doesn't cause the symptoms he was experiencing, he asked, "whats plaque? ... is it plague or plaque".

And, once again, I berated him telling him that if he didn't know what plaque was he was in no position to diagnose anybody with anything. And, like the ill-fated giant mechanical worm in "The Core", I pressed onward again and asked why he thought he had HIV in the first place.

And thus the friendly neighborhood hypochondriac got skeered and left the room. The numb-skull never did explain why he thought his ridiculous symptoms were caused by HIV. Going so far to call his spleen (which was almost undetecably "enlarged") a lymph node. Apparently, anything in the lymphatic system is a "node" to this guy.

Just when I think I've seen the worst of these fuckers, someone new comes along...

And, now, back to the chat room to lie in wait....

AL 721

It's more than just a seemingly random collection of letters and numbers. It's not a new Gas/Water Hybrid SUV from Mitsubishi with a 1-cylinder engine. It's "A more promising and simpler alternative cure" than AZT. (Nevermind that AZT doesn't cure HIV nor AIDS; just helps stop the virus from replicating.) This is according to A Web Site on Alternative AIDS Cures. (Nevermind, also, that there is no known fucking cure for AIDS in the first place; how can there be "Alternative" cures???)

What is AL 721 if it isn't a new Mercedes? It's "Active Lupids at a ratio of 7:2:1" and made from chicken egg yolks. (Hey! I wonder if this has anything to do with the brain worms from last year??) And, like everything these sorts of fuckers put out, it has "no side effects". Really? Not even for those who have an allergy to chicken eggs??

AL 721 is a "buttery substance" which is used on toast in the morning for "several weeks until the symptoms disappear". There ARE NO SYMPTOMS of HIV or AIDS. (Well, in the broad sense, anyway. You can't look at a person which HIV and see something that definitively indicates that person has HIV. Or AIDS for that matter.) What the FUCK is this asshole talking about!?

All this shit is is mayonaise. Fucking Best Foods Mayonaise. Eat mayonaise on your toast in the morning and cure AIDS! Yippee!!!

(Ok, to be downright fair and all that shit (something these fuckers don't allow themselves) I don't really know how this AL 721 shit is made. But mayonaise *is* made from egg yolks.)

(Best Foods Mayonaise has nothing to do with this post. Nothing to do with this Blog. It is a fine mayonaise and terrific in potato salad. Now, get off my back you damn monkey-lawyer!)

Bio-Lyfe Immune Booster

This bullshit came to me from an unusual place; this very blog. You've probably noticed those "Ads by Goooooogle" things on every damn page. I stuck 'em on here to try to make a tiny bit of money. And this Parazapper™ rip-off was one of the ads. So I clicked on it... And it made me laugh. So, here we go!!!

The bullshit Bio-Lyfe Immune Booster (Patent Pending) hails from Australia. And, although I've never been there, I like Australia. So this isn't a rant against the country/continent.

The device, which delivers a "high voltage, muti-wave electrical signal," was studied by Australian scientists in Afria during a grueling, intensive study in Africa. Their results showed marked improvment in the large test sample.

Ok, now it's time to define a couple words for the purpose of this blog entry. "Grueling" and "intenstive" means it was studied for two months. Two whole months. "Marked Improvement" means a measly 6% improvement (which could just be normal fluctuations; it's difficult to tell over such a short time period). "Large test sample" means 26 people. So, in reality, these "scientists" "studied" just over 50 people (half were the control group and the other half did the bullshit) for two months and consider that enough fucking evidence to claim their bullshit device works. And, to be completely fair, they do publish their, uh, "research" paper on the "study" on the site.

I'm no research scientist but even I can find problems with their methodolgy. They say nothing of the even the most basic demographics of the test sample other than age and sex (only two females). Nothing at all about their general health, nothing about how long they've been infected with HIV, whether or not they have any active infections, whether or not they've been diagnosed with AIDS, whether or not the patient is doing anything to treat their HIV infection... NOTHING.

Further, in the "research" paper, they say, "...Many AIDS-infected patients in Angola go without any anti-viral treatment." Any self-respecting doctor would know to call it "anti-retroviral" treatment. Further, nobody is "infected" with AIDS; one is infected by HIV which causes the syndrome which is called AIDS. And, for the "control group" they simply randomly chose patients--without their knowledge nor consent--at the hospital who were HIV positive but not taking any medications for their HIV infection.

I picked a test-sample patient at random; #25. His Viral load at Months 0, 1, and 2 were, respectively, 737,138, 547,288, and 685,214. While I didn't know they could get that kind of precision at those levels--all I've ever seen is round thousands at those levels (i.e., 708,000, 570,000, etc.)--I'm willing to let that precision go. However, those numbers simply REEK of standard fluctuations in one's Viral Load!

It goes on. With silly graphs and someone's drawing--a drawing, not a picture--of the Bio-Lyfe device. Ultimately, if this were a serious study of the effects of the device on HIV-infection, the "research paper" only indicates a need for further, more complete, peer-reviewed, double-blind study and not these idiot's claims that the thing actually works. In almost any research, you always find what you're looking for. (Cold Fusion, for example.) And these people wanted this device to work, so it does. For them. So long as they interpret the data.

And, Finally, they claim this bullshit device "can be used by an individual or shared by up to 100 other people." I assume in some sort of hand-holding circle around the device.... Kum-bye-ya, baby!

Not Having Sex

And now, for a word from the religious right...

The folks at Turning Point Ranch say on their web site at http://www.tpranch.org/Cure%20for%20AIDS.htm that the cure for AIDS is abstinence. Yes, indeed, simply by not having sex, we can cure AIDS... Oh, but not for those who already have it, only for the vast majority of those who don't have it. Sorta like blaming the person for getting sick. If you get the flu, it's your own damn fault for breathing.

And, to be fair, yes, if everybody stopped having sex, the incidence of HIV transmission would drop dramatically. (And so would the birth rate....) But they ignore one basic fact: Sex is Fun. Sex feels good. You simply can't expect the entire world to stop having sex because you think it's a good idea.

They also talk about "AIDS-infected men". And that's just wrong terminology. Nobody is infected with AIDS. Nobody "gets" AIDS. People get infected with HIV which then can develop into AIDS. It may be splitting hairs but I think it's also an important distinction.

Anyway, if nobody had sex anymore, AIDS will go away. (Except for those who get it through sharing needles. Or from needle sticks in the ER. The site conviently ignores those two different infection vectors... Ah, well... We can't win 'em all...)

Restorazine

Every now and then something comes along that just makes me laugh outloud... This Bullshit Restorazine is one of those things. According to one "Doctor" Deswin Fisi Adubiaro (who had wandered aimlessly into the HIV/AIDS:1 chat room on Yahoo! bumping his head on the door knob on his way in) from Nigeria at his badly written web site Restorazine is known for "restoring the dead back to normal life..." Yes indeedy folks, this week's bullshit will raise the dead!!!!! Must be powerful damn stuff... (You'd think H.P. Lovecraft would have known about this thing for "Reanimator"; jus' keep that body-less head with the nasty tongue away from me!!!!)

According to the web site above (also titled "EZEKIEL 37 THERAPIES"; yes in all caps) Restorazine not only is a cure for HIV/AIDS it is also described in the sentence fragment, "A remedy (Flying on Eagles Wing)." Whatever the hell that means. But, this Dr. Fuki guy damns the Run-On Sentence Cops and says it's "A scientifically researched and refined herbal mixture of 13 solid herbal ingredients that are very effective in eliminating and eradicating deadly micro-organisms in human system [sic] e.g. Virus, Bacteria, Fungi, Protozoan and Parasites." Take that, you copper!!!

On the "Our Vision" page, Dr. Fiji rattles out another Run-on sentence offense in, "The story that led to this evergreen glory {Discovery of RESTORAZINE} came into being in the month of February 2nd, 2001 through an unforgettable dream and after that, Dr Fisi humbly went into series of research after when he had requested from God and confirmed that his dream is a reality to come." I hate to jus' mock someone's punctuation and all (I know I have my moments, you know, with these, things, you know, like commas, and such) but this guy really should hire an editor.

Regardless. So, it came to him in a dream... Last night I had a dream I was looking through a manufactured home that was floating in space. Really. I was. Does that mean I should be making the International Mobile Space Trailer a reality??

Not only does this bullshit cure HIV and AIDS, Dr. Fuki blurts out the statement, "RESTORAZINE- Making the world a healthy and purified Planet." No, really. He says that; again, on the Our Vision page.

Elsewhere, he says, "This remedy is so powerful to an extent that it knocks off even some other diseases that no other remedy made for HIV AIDS can eliminate peacefully in human system, e.g. "KARPOSI SARCOMA". This disease happens in cancer patients most and whoever develops it will be made to know that it can't be treated but RESTORAZINE takes it off and restore back good life."

Apparently, he doesn't know that KS (Kaposi's Sarcoma in its correct spelling) *IS* a cancer. It's a skin cancer. So, naturally--by definition--someone with KS is a cancer patient.

Dr. Figit seems to have just the barest nugget of truth, a smidgeon of good intentions and a whole truck load of bad information, bad photography, bad medicine, and outrageously bizarre claims. He doesn't even have the nerve to put up scientifically reviewed testimonials. He's like an amature in this HIV/AIDS Cure Game. If he really wants to play with the big dogs, he'll hafta get up to speed faster. Oh, and, like, learn how to write, really well, sentences with all the right, and correct, punctuation and then he can pay his fines to the run on sentence cops so he can then hire an editor for his web site and so he can finally start at least appearing like he's making sense. (I wonder if Restorazine can repair bad grammar....)

(To be fair, in the chat room when I asked if this product can raise the dead, "Dr." Fisi said that it doesn't do that. No shit, Sherlock. And it doesn't cure AIDS nor HIV infection, either.)

Urine

Splashing our way back into the icky file (see: The Sputnik) we come to the, uh, other end of things. Yes, kids, urine can cure AIDS. If you don't believe me check the obviously credible and scientifically reviewed and studied testimonials at http://users.erols.com/martinlara/testimo.html. He has two of them so you know they're not made up. But, the jist of the first one is this:

Some guy named Max Caicedo was visiting his family in Puerto Rico. He apparently had been given "month or two to live" by his doctors so he apparently though it was <sob!> the last time. He had "opportunistic infections caused by AIDS." (Nevermind that AIDS is defined partially by having opportunistic infections (OI) and that those OIs are caused by HIV weakening the immune system so it can't fight off the viruses, etc. which cause the OI. That's where the word "opportunistic" comes from; they take the opportunity to infect. But I digress...)

The testimonial continues and says that he'd been taking "medication for several years", was in a wheelchair, was very weak and was <SOB!> "close to death." But some gullible, loving niece <clutch pearls here> in New York had faith he would recover. She illegally recorded a lecture this Martin Lara freak gave on an unnamed radio station in New York and "rushed the tape to her uncle". There was <dab tears with hanky> no time to loose--"Caicedo had lost faith and had already paid for funeral services and a cemetery plot."

(We'll be right back after this word from our sponsors. "SUCKER!")

Since he had <grasp loved-one's hand> "nothing left to lose" (except his dignity and fresh breath) he listened to the tape and decided to toss out all his medications and start drinking his own piss. After all, everything one hears on the radio has got to be true, right? "This is a decision that he will never regret because it saved his life."

Within three days Mr. Lara says this guy "had eliminated more excrement than in the previous six months." <release loved-one's hand and run for the bathroom to vomit...> "All his aches and pains were gone by the first week and his appetite and desire to live were back 100 percent. Within 10 days he had no need for the wheelchair and was gaining weight." Six weeks after the radio interview" (Interview? What interview? The stupid testimonial never mentioned an interview...) "he attended one of my monthly lectures to describe his positive experience with Uropathy." Mr. Lara says Caicedo was a new man (with bad breath) who had gained 30 pounds. (I'm guessing it was all water weight.) And, six months later, he was a globe-trotting trendsetter visiting Mexico and Miami and was on his way to Spain.

Ok, I've read up on this bullshit and here's what I understand the thinking behind drinking your own piss to be. The kidneys filter out what the body doesn't need at that moment and then it's eliminated in urine. Since, there are possibly some stuff in that urine that you simply didn't need at the moment it was filtered through your kidneys you can reingest that urine to get that stuff back into your body. And, by doing this, you get the best possible use out of everything you eat. Provided it's liquid, I guess.

Why not just eat more of the thing that provided the nutrients in the first place!?!? Why do these fuckers think that drinking something your body's already gotten rid of is good! I really hate to admit it but I know of several people who are, uh, into water sports--I don't mean the type you'd see at the summer Olympics--and they haven't been cured of anything!

No matter how nicely Mr. Lara or Mr. Caicedo ask I am not having them people over for a cocktail party...

Water - The Sequel

New! Bigger! LONGER! WETTER!

I don't quite now how to start in on this one. This comes from the loonies over on Curezone.com; a repository of sound, quality, and fully researched advice. In a message posted to their forums, a user calling himself "-2tuff-" makes the utterly ridiculous statment, "Theres NOTHING a water fast of proper length cannot cure and thats been proven for oooo the last 7000 years whilst its been in use possibly more." He/she/it then goes on to say, "Again Viruses etc can be beat just with Fasting if done correctly (meaning more than 1 day haha) and when I say this I mean anything up to 70 days but most times 30 days tops."

Ok, so. Just by ingesting water, and only water, for a long enough period of time, all illnesses will go away. OF COURSE THEY WILL, you FUCKING NIMROD!!! An untreated cold has a length of about 5-7 days. The flu, about two weeks. I suppose -2tuff- would say that if you did a water fast for 5-7 days, you'd knock out the cold. The body will knock out the illness on its own! And, if it doesn't, you'll die. (I'd personally hate to have a chronic cold for the rest of my life...) And, if you die, the illness goes away with you!

This is how superstitions get started. If you find that your water fast didn't cure your flu, well, you didn't do it long enough and it's all your fault. You gotta do it again. And again. Until, voila!, your flu is gone! And you owe it all to ingesting only water for the entire duration! Has nothing to do with the virus just running its course...

And, on top of all this, he pricelessly lambasts the Beck Protocol for being completely wrong! I *love* it when these bullshitters start attacking each other's bullshit! (I tackle the bullshit Beck Protocol back at the end of July 2005 on this blog. Check the archives. I'd've linked to it, but it spans four days.)

(GOD! I love doing this! Even if it becomes drudgery at times, every now and then something like this comes along and makes it all worth it! I'm still trying to find out if Chemtrails cause AIDS...)

Mark Anastasi's "Fill-in-the-Blank Miracle Breathrough" Ebook Review

Some months ago, Mark Anastasi decided that I'm somehow defaming his character by relating non-libelous truths about him and what he does. In that message he inexplicably sent me a free copy of his $97 Ebook, "The AIDS/HIV Breakthrough Miracle". While I had difficulty opening the file at first thanks to a crappy dialup connection (the same crappy dialup connection that's forced me to go to a Weekly update rather than Daily) I have finally been able to open the Ebook.

Although I would like to post a copy of it to the blog for free downloading I can't do that for a number of reasons. First and foremost, copyright laws and my respect for them. However, there is nothing at all preventing me from reviewing the Ebook and then posting my opinion of it. Even the quotes I take from the Ebook are protected under the Fair Use laws because I'm simply writing a review.

In fact, this blog almost demands I post a review of it and I will reveal this so-called "breakthrough miracle". So hang on; here 'goes....

Who's the Real Author?
One of the first things I noticed about Mark Anastasi's ridiculously priced Ebook isn't even contained in the content of the Ebook. It's in the document properties. While the File states the correct file name (how could it not?) the Title and Author fields have nothing to do with Mark Anastasi nor HIV/AIDS. The title apparently is really "A Letter to Diabetics Everywhere" written by one "Mudrika Bhudia". Although Mr. Anastasi thanks this Mudrika Bhudia in the book, a quick Google, MSN, Yahoo!, Dogpile.com, and Wikipedia search for "Mudrika Bhudia" yielded precisely zero results. Not a single one. So while I'm respectful of copyright laws, Mr. Anastasi doesn't seem to care very much.

Another sign of his lack of caring is the seeming different sources for the Ebook. From chapter to chapter, the writing style changes. I don't care enough to do a scientific study on the possiblity of different authors for each of the chapters but a simple read produces enough doubt for me. Most obvious to me is the different spellings of "disease"; in some places, it's "disease" and in others it's "dis-ease" complete with quotes. Does Mr. Anastasi think he's fooling anybody?

Pay for Free Information?
The Ebook is a complete waste of money as well as hard drive space. On Mr. Anastasi's web site, one can sign up and have a free report sent to you. 77 of the $97 Ebook's 81 pages (that's a massive 93%) are made up of the very same free report that Mr. Anastasi will happily send to you and other information from his various websites. Only a very small portion of the Ebook (a whopping four pages) mentions anything about HIV or AIDS. Since Mr. Anastasi has so many "Fill-in-the-Blank Breakthrough Miracle" Ebooks for sale, I can only presume that the only thing that changes from the HIV version to the Lupus, Cancer, Diabetes and Mutiple Sclerosis versions is that tiny section.

(He owns--or at least is the registrant--for a large number of hyphenated web sites such as www.health-answers.com, www.your--health.com (yes, with two hyphens), www.vibrant-life-and-health.com, www.health-ebooks.org and an untold number of others. (Search Google for "acts as an affiliate to Mark Anastasi's products." to see more. NOTE: As of July 18, 2006, these sites are mysteriously missing from that search. Some of the sites are still up and running; others are "Under Construction". Apparently, Mr. Anastasi has found a way to eliminate the sites from the search. However, a quick look-see at the site that hosts all of the style sheets for the sites (http://www.healthy--life.com/master_files; yes, with two hyphens.) yields some interesting details. Also, a quick Google search for "First, picture your body as a car," will yield other sites.) All of these essentially identical sites list as having cures Acne, Cancer, Eczema, Multiple Sclerosis, AIDS, Cholesterol, Fibromyalgia, Osteoporosis, Arthritis, Chronic Fatigue, Gout, Psoriasis, Athlete's Foot, Depression, Health & Energy, Weight-Loss, Asthma, Diabetes, Lupus, and Yeast Infection. And, to be fair, what he says about gout as being caused by eating too much meat is correct. But you don't need to pay $97 to know that by reducing the amount of red meat you ingest will reduce the incidence of gout. That's no miracle.)

Contradictory Admonitions
The "Disclaimer" in the book he sent me, "The AIDS/HIV Breakthrough Miracle", contains the following,

"Before beginning any practice relating to health, diet or exercise, it is highly recommended that you first obtain the consent and advice of a licensed health care professional.

"The author assumes no responsibility for the choices you make after your review of the information contained herein and your consultation with a licensed healthcare professional.

"None of the statements in this article or in the book have been evaluated by the Food & Drug Administration (FDA), or the American Medical Association (AMA)."

A standard Disclaimer. However, later in the book, Mr. Anastasi proceeds to attack the very "Heathcare Professionals" he suggests you go see. He says, among other things:

• "The pharmaceutical industry and medical establishment are doing EVERYTHING in their power to discredit 3,000-year old science, even going as far as lobbying the European Commission to pass laws banning vitamin and supplement companies!"
• "The medical monopoly or medical trust, euphemistically called the American Medical Association, is not merely the meanest monopoly ever organized, but the most arrogant, dangerous and despotic organization which ever managed a free people in this or any other age." (Actually part of a 7-page-long quote from "The Drug Story")
• "The medical profession and their pseudo-scientific dogma kills 250,000 Americans a year! They are the 3rd leading cause of death in the U.S!"
• "According to the American Medical Association, the half-life of the current medical education is 4 years. This means that a doctor leaving school today knows 50% more about medicine than someone who left 4 years ago. With so many patients to see, doctors rarely have time to further their education." (Emphasis in Original)

Is Mr. Anastasi bipolar and off his meds?

Pure Marketing
Mr. Anastasi is not a doctor; isn't a scientist and can't practice medicine. What he can do is call himself a specialist in "Online Marketing". No kidding. He's a marketing guy. It's obvious.

A friend of mine who was in the marketing department for a large electronics company used to joke, "I'm from Marketing. You can't believe a word that comes out of my mouth." That joke seems to be painfully real and prescient in Mr. Anastasi's case.

The Ebook seems to be nothing more than a written Multi-Level Marketing seminar. The most telling clue is this quote: "Chances are, the information I will be sharing with you over the next 7 days is unlike ANYTHING you will have ever come across in your life so far." Unless Mr. Anastasi knows that his Ebook will take seven days to read why even mention something about "7 days"?

Further, the Ebook uses the usual MLM technique of repeating the same damn information over and over and over. And the annoying overuse of "You see...." I know people write like they talk, but this is ridiculous!

Clueless Author!
He says that sugar is one of the things, along with Coffee ("pure acid", he says), drugs, nicotine, alcohol, and vinegar, that one should stop eating in order to be healthy. But, earlier in the very same section (Section III, "Nutrients") Mr. Anastasi advocates eating all types of berries (which contain sugar), beets (which, not surprisingly, is the source of beet sugar), and molasses (which is nothin' but sugar).

I'm pretty sure that he means to eliminate eating refined sugar. Why then does he advocate eating molasses which is a byproduct of processing sugar cane into granulated sugar? Regardless of what Mr. Anastasi means he is consistantly unclear and imprecise.

He also says, "you must Eliminate Your Ingestion of Unhealthy Fats & Oils, Animal Flesh, and Dairy Products." And then later on the very same page he says that "essential fatty acids" from "some types of fish are very good for you". Unless there has been some major reclassification of what constitutes an "Animal" these days, aren't fish an animal!? Oh, I know what it is; fish aren't cute and cuddly....

Further, in the tiny section actually dealing with HIV and AIDS, he tosses out a statistic that "95% of all AIDS cases occur in the poorest countries." He then launches into a greatly curtailed version of the tired old "HIV doesn't cause AIDS" and blames AIDS on the "inner terrain" of the person. (Most of the Ebook is devoted to talking about how "polluted" the cells--the "inner terrain"--of all of us have become in the past 50 years and how this "pollution" is the cause of all our problems.) However, the way of life in these "poorest" countries hasn't changed much in the past 50 years. They're still eating the same vegetables (raw and cooked) and the same types of meats they have for decades.

Does this guy actually read what he's writing?

Just because he says it doesn't mean it's true...
Throughout the Ebook Mr. Anastasi makes so many remarkable and unsubstantiated claims it's laughable. The Ebook offers no bibliography to identify any of his sources. The only conclusion is to assume that Mr. Anastasi has simply made up his statements. For example:

• "...Everyone has operated on the mistaken supposition that germs and viruses cause disease."
• "1 in 3 Americans get cancer, but only 1 in 7 American athletes get cancer. Why? Because athletes get a lot more oxygen flowing into their body!"
• "People with fatty, unhealthy diets are often tired and sick. You see, when there’s too much unhealthy fat (and toxins) in your system, your red blood cells stick together, they move more slowly, and as a result you get far less oxygen reaching your cells. Your cells then become weaker – some cells may even die or mutate. That’s why so many studies show high fat intake related to cancer."
• "Our bodies are NOT designed to eat meat!"
• "Milk is the most mucus-forming food you can imagine! The WORST part is, it covers the inside of your intestines and it hardens it like concrete! It coats the villi that absorb the nutrients, preventing them from performing their role!"
• "To really get the most out of your food, ... do not mix carbohydrates with proteins."
• "[Psoriasis and Eczema are] simply acid coming out directly through your skin."
• "AIDS is due to having a highly acidic and toxic bloodstream, where your white blood cells are overcome with toxins and morbid matter."
• "I have seen people go from being HIV-positive to HIV-negative within 30 days of starting to alkalize and energize by taking Dr. Young’s Supergreens™."

Early in the Ebook he actually quotes the Red Pill/Blue Pill speech from Morpheus in The Matrix as a way to drive his point home. I'm astounded that someone would try to use an entirely fictional story as a credible way of getting us to think like he does.

At the very end of the Ebook he lists various "services" he offers. And here they are:

• "Public Speaking
  $4,000 an hour
  Corporate events, seminars, exhibitions, conventions.
  
  
• The LifeQuest Corporate Health-Check
  $12,000 per consultation and delivery of training.
  Benefits: drastically reduce lost productivity due to sick days. Massively increase energy, creativity, and overall wellbeing of your staff.
  
  
• Live Forever Clinic
  $50,000 per intervention.
  Only 12 clients a year.
  The Live Forever Clinic is a London-based consultancy for high net-worth individuals interested in longevity extension and physical immortality.
  We use cutting-edge non-mainstream technology as well as esoteric principles to heal and rejuvenate.
  
  
• LifeQuest Healing Centers®
  $200,000 per franchise
  We are seeking investors to set up LifeQuest Healing Centers around the world, where patients will be treated and healed through natural means, as well as empowered about their health through education."
  

A "Live Forever Clinic"!?!? Please! (One wonders if Dick Clark is a client....)

Conclusion
Anastasi contradicts himself, makes unproven and ridiculous claims, apparently steals information from others, and tries to make us believe he's helping people. The only person he's really trying to help is himself.

The Ebook is badly written, poorly designed, poorly constructed, badly misinformed, and possibly harmful. It takes 81 pages to really just be an advertisement for eating raw foods. Yes, this "miracle breakthrough" is not much more than "Eat Raw Food and your Fill-in-the-Blank illness will go away."

Really, I could go on and on and on; I've completely bypassed whole sections. But I really think this is enough information for anybody to make up their mind about whether or not Mark Anastasi is on the up and up. I'm sure you can figure out what my opinion is.

Selenium

In the article titled "Selenium Conquers AIDS?" over on http://www.alkalizeforhealth.net/Laidscure.htm Sam Burcher, a member or writer or someone affiliated with the wholely scientific science organization known as The Institute of Science in Society, states (or at the very least implies) that AIDS is caused by a low selenium levels in a person.

He really doesn't seem to know what he's talking about. He takes the shot gun approach ("Maybe one of these things will it the target...") and shoots out things like "The cause of progression of HIV to AIDS is still unknown" (which is bullshit).

He starts out by saying, "During the last decade, research has indicated an important geographical link between regions of selenium deficient soils and peak incidences of HIV/AIDS infection."

Yoo, hoo!!! Mr. Burcher-man!!!! The cause of one isn't necessarily the other!!! It's entirely possible (and almost completely ignored in the article except for one tiny anecdotal speck) that areas hit hard by HIV simply, by pure coincidence, have low selenium levels in their soil. To verify that, Mr. Butcher would actually have had to do some work and collect a LOT of soil samples preferably for a double-blind study to verify the correlation between low selenium levels and HIV infection.

(God, I'm out of practice... Four months of not doin' this has been rough...)

UPDATE: Mark Anastasi

A continuation of the "Eating Raw Fruits and Vegetables" post....

I've recently been honored by an email message directly from Mr. Mark Anastasi. I can't say how pleased I was that my blog is getting more and more notoriety. Unfortunately, Mr. Anastasi didn't have very nice things to say about me. Here's what he wrote to me:

"Dear Bryan,

I have just checked out your blog on AIDS.

It is very unfortunate that you have fallen what [sic] the pharmaceutical industry's lies and medical establishment's pseudo-science.

I have attached a copy of my ebook, free of charge, and hope to educate you about what is REALLY going on.

This is bonafide GENUINE information.
You are doing a lot of people a disservice by advertising your ignorance.

Fair warning: I am going to instruct my lawyers to start legal proceedings against you by the end of the month unless your blog is removed, for defamation of character.

Best regards
Mark Anastasi"

Ok, I checked out my post ridiculing him. There's no "defamation of character". Nothing I say is a lie or false. Here's a hint to Mr. Anastasi: It isn't libel or slander if it's true...

I find it almost hysterical that he mentions the "medical establishment's pseudo-science". I challege Mr. Anastasi to produce independantly verified and published (in JAMA or similar journal) proof that what he says is true. I think I'll just sit here and wait for him to do so.

It may be "genuine information" but that doesn't mean it's true or right or correct or any number of other synonyms.

Regardless, I apprecaite his unsolicited mailing of his 3 megabyte .pdf file. I would love to pass it out to those who might ask; unfortunately, I can't. Not only would that be illegal (copyright laws, etc.) but the damn .pdf file is broken. I can't even open it myself. Oh, well...

And, Mr. Anastasi, your grammar stinks.

Shining a Light (or Two) on Your Torso

This is a photograph of a person having her (or his, I'm not really sure) Assemblage Point realigned using the Lux IV. According to Whale Medical's Very Badly Designed Web Page, "With all serious illness its location will almost always be found in an adverse position. In the case of serious misalignment, if the patient's Assemblage Point location is not moved back to a central location, the chances of recovery are drastically reduced - regardless of medication or therapies undertaken."

"What is this Assemblage Point bullshit?" you ask. It's a point just to the right of your breast bone. In women, it's higher than men. And, if that Assemblage Point shifts down.... well, you'd better get ready to die.

According to Jon Whale and his web site:

This is a dangerous, uncomfortable and distressing location indicated by very low mental and physical energy with acute psychological instability and physiological disturbances. Frontal brain energy will be low impairing the functions of the endocrine glands and organs. From this location it is virtually impossible to recover without realignment of the Assemblage Point. As the Assemblage Point's rear location or pivot point drops down from the shoulder blade area, muscular coordination becomes affected.

With this location, serious psychiatric or physical illness will often be present such as auto immune disease syndrome (A.I.D.S.), cancer, meningitis, cerebral thrombosis, apoplexy, clinical depression, post natal depression, myalgic encephalomyelitis (M.E. syndrome) and multiple sclerosis (M.S. syndrome).

Pay no attention to the fact they got the meaning of AIDS completely wrong (Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome). Besides, I bet you thought AIDS was caused by HIV, didn't you? Bet you didn't know that it was caused by a shift in your Assemblage Point. I bet you didn't even know you had an Assemblage Point. See? I'm just here to educate!

So, to realign your Assemblage Point, you need to use the Lux IV. Which just shines colored light onto your body. They have all sorts of infrared pictures of "patients" after treatment showing greater warmth in the area "treated" with light. Nevermind that the light itself is probably causing the warm skin. Such obvious truths mean nothing to Mr. Whale!

Regardless, the light that Mr. Wacko uses is filtered through crystals, gems, and colored gels. Why? I don't know. I suppose to make it pretty. And to give the impression that something is actually happening when it really isn't.

Note to Jon Whale: AIDS is caused by HIV and can't be helped--in any way--by shining light on a person's body. No matter how many purty colors of light are used.

(The highly clinical photograph earlier in this post was taken from http://www.whalemedical.com/ap1.html and then cropped.)

UPDATE: The ParaZapper™

One David Etheredge has taken me to task on his bullshit ParaZapper™. Reproduced here is his comment on my ParaZapper™ post. I make my comments in Bold and Blue:

Dear lacking in knowlege and intelligence, (That's a good way to make friends.)

Of all things, besides being a complete idiot, you are a complete liar. (No, you are the liar, you nit-wit. Lying implies deceit or intent to deceive. I made a simple error in who owns the trademark to ParaZapper™; which, by the way, is still bullshit no matter who owns the trademark. I in no way intended to deceive who owned the trademark. You, however, *are* intending to deceive with your bullshit.)

First, Dr. Clark Does not own, have any interest in, or any involvement with ParaZapper!

I am the owner of the trademark ParaZapper and I am the design engineer who creates all of the products owned by the company Para Systems and Devices, LLC. These are based on her design but are improvements beyond. (Fair enough. However, you really should learn how to make complete sentences before you go blasting away at people.)

None of the ParaZapper sites are Dr. Clarks and she does not get any money or any thing else from us except an occasional letter thanking her for her efforts. (So, she gives away her books on her fake cures for all diseases? She has no vested interest in trying to get people to electrocute themselves to abate their cancer?)

Additionally, Dr. Clarks zapper is free to build yourself and there are published schematics all over the internet for various models.

While we do offer our products as available for HIV and AIDS infected individuals we do not offer them as a cure. We also have a money back guarantee. (Oh, come now. Don't insult my intelligence. You say that HIV and AIDS may be caused by parasites and, all over your web site, you also say that your ParaZapper™ kills the parasites that make one ill. How can you keep that information completely insulated from each other? C'mon!)

We also do not suggest that anyone use the ParaZapper in place of any medication. (Nice way to cover your ass in the event you get sued by anybody who's harmed by your bullshit. You must sleep really, really well at night.)

For your information, ParaZapper is being tested at a major US university and does show a reduction of viral load in many but not all cases. (Yeah, yeah. Which "major US university"? Yale? Certainly not. MIT? Doubtful. College of CowFart, Alabama? Probably. Who's doing the testing? What department? What's the person's name? What's their specialty? When did they start testing? When do they expect to finish?)

As for the individual who told the Yahoo chat room visitor that ParaZapper was BS, which model did that well advised person buy and use that made him such an authority? (I'm *extremely* pleased that you recognize that the person who says your ParaZapper™ is bullshit was well-advised! Now, if you could just stop saying that your bullshit device will actually help people... Naw, that might cut into your revenue stream....)

Mr. Etheredge, thank you for your comments. You have allowed the world (Or at least the readers of this blog) to see what kind of asshole you really are. And, next time you want to go galavanting around the internet and calling people liars, you should probably look yourself in the mirror before you go throwing stones in your glass house.

While the ParaZapper™ is still bullshit, I have corrected the original ParaZapper™ post to reflect who actually owns the trademark.

Vitamin K

Yep. Vitamin K. That thing that they put into Olestra products to help with--well, there's no polite way to say this--anal leakage. Ok, maybe that was the polite way to say shit oozing uncontrollably from your ass...

This guy, Ashok T. Jaisinghani, got at least one thing right; Vitamin K does indeed help with clotting blood. However, after that, everything goes downhill. Fast.

Mr. Jaisinghani keeps mentioning "Diarrheal AIDS" but never really actually defines what that means or is supposed to mean or what it means in his little head or what. He also seems to think that AIDS is caused by (among other things):

1. Excessive intakes of laxative factors like iodine, vitamin D, chromium, zinc, manganese and magnesium;
2. Phosphoric acid used in foods and drinks, especially cola beverages;
3. Residues of petroleum products like hexane in cooking oils and fats;
4. Paraffin used as a coating on fruits and vegetables, and as a laxative in medicine;
5. Castor oil that is a contaminant in cooking oils and fats, and foodgrains;
6. Aspirin;
7. and Tea.

You'll notice a distinct lack of HIV or even any iota of a mention or suggestion of anything scientific or anything else of the sort. So you know Mr. Jaminghandi is on the up and up...

In regards to tea, Mr. Jiggywithit says, "The consumption of many cups of strong tea can also cause AIDS in susceptible persons like hemophiliacs." And, in a direct contradiction of the Garlic Guy from earlier, he says that garlic can cause AIDS, too. Where the FUCK does this god damn idiot get his information!? He doesn't even have any deceitful testimonials! Surely, anybody in this fake cure business needs to have testimonials to be taken seriously!!! (Of course, I don't take any of this bullshit seriously. It's all just that; bullshit.)

Anyway, the fat soluable Vitamin K helps with blood clotting. In fact, it's essential for it. However, blood clots have absolutely nothing to do with AIDS or even HIV infection. And, making sure your blood clots correctly isn't going to kill any virus in your body.

Whatta maroon. Whattan ignoramus!

The Beck Protocol (Part 4; Ozonated Water)

Finally, we get to Part 4, "Drinking freshly ozonated water"

Note the word "fresh". It's gotta be fresh. None of that old, stale crap you got by shaking your water bottle. Oh, no. That's too old for the Bullshit Beck Protocol.

And, how does one get freshly ozonated water? Wouldn't ya know it!? They have an ozonator for sale on the usual Beck Protocol web site. (Is there any doubt now that these fuckers are more out for your money than your health??)

And all this shit is just arbitrary, anyway. Absolutely no science behind this "Protocol". This "drinking freshly ozonated water" crap was added to the protocol, well, after realizing that they needed another way to bilk money out of people. Ok, ok; that isn't what they say. They say it was added when this Bob Beck fuck heard that people were having trouble releasing "toxins" (Always with the toxins!! Oy!) from the body and Mr. Beck decided that drinking water with oxygen in it (which already has oxygen; it's the O part of H₂O....) would help flush toxins. But I don't believe them.

So, that's it for the Beck Protocol. Electrify your silvernated blood while electrocuting your tissues and drinking water. What fuckin' nim-rod would try to pass this bullshit on as a cure for AIDS. (Oh! Mr. Bob Beck!) And why the hell won't people realize that testimonials are not proof? Le sigh....